Aine from DC Geeks took some time out of her busy schedule covering notable geek events in the district to conduct an interview with regular old me. I was really honored. Interviewing other people is a big part of my job, so I know what a time commitment it is when somebody else prepares questions for me.

A really good interviewer can be like a brainstorming partner; when she asks questions about your beliefs, it can help you to affirm and solidify them. Aine’s question about my use of the word “weeaboo” did that for me.

I know that with a word with a history as contentious of that of “weeaboo” will always be problematic, but I think my answer here is the one I most believe in:

Aine: Another quick terminology question: weeaboo. Are we taking it back? Or do we need to wait a bit before it loses its racist connotations?

Lauren: I was taken aback by your word “racist,” but it’s true. When I reviewed the etymology of the word, I remembered that “weeaboo” was the Perry Bible Fellowship nonsense word that 4chan used as a replacement for any instance of the word “wapanese.”

However, I don’t believe weeaboos are intentionally racist. I recently wrote about Saturday Night Live’s sketch about weeaboos (and a lively discussion is still going on in the comments), and I particularly liked what the professor said about the overenthusiastic students:

“If there’s such a thing as a loving version of racism, I think you’ve found it.”

I’ve used the word “weeaboo” to describe myself a few times: when I cooked Japanese food, when I bought a kotatsu, and when I wore a kimono to celebrate my 24th birthday at a sushi restaurant. I’ve even written an apologetic letter to Asian people about my embarrassment over being so enthusiastic about a culture that is not my own, nor do I have any idea about. (I have never even been to Japan.)

I realize that my interest in Japanese culture could be misconstrued as racism, and so I feel guilty about it. But I think my enthusiasm, as is the case with all weeaboos, comes from a very well intentioned place.

Does anyone else ever feel guilty about a fandom-inspired interest in Japan?